When you find out your pregnant, it’s amazing. Of course it is, especially when you’ve planned the pregnancy. You begin to picture yourself with your little shrimp, holding him for the first time and picturing if he’ll have daddy’s eyes or mummy’s lips. It’s an exciting time and there are plenty of lovely thoughts to go with it.
However, there are a lot of things that us pregnant women must think at some point down the line, that make us panic a little bit and wonder what the hell are we doing. Even if this is everything you have ever wanted! Here’s a few that popped into my head…
Oh shit, shit, shit. Do I even want children?!
Of course, the answer is yes! WE PLANNED THIS PREGNANCY. But for some unknown reason, there are split moments when you realise how much life will have to change and it’s actually kind of scary and pretty darn overwhelming! Life right now is quite nice and simple. I can sleep when I like, I can go on holiday whenever I like and I don’t really have to think about anyone else but me and Myles.
What If I Am An Awful Mum?
I’ve never done this before, what if I’m terrible at it? What if he doesn’t like me? What if I forget to feed/bath/wind/change him?!
I’m pretty sure every first time expectant mum goes through this little stage. The fact you are even questioning if you’re going to be a good mummy or not, already makes you a good mum. You got this!
How The Eff Am I Going To Push An Actual Human Being Out Of My Lady Parts?
So I’m almost 25 weeks and already scared shitless about this. At the minute our boy weighs just over 1lb – I’m pretty sure he is going to grow a heck of lot larger than his planned exit route in the next few months.
Can we just point out that a watermelon sized being is going to be squeezed and squished out of a hole that’s like a 10th of its size when fully dilated… how is that possible?!
Following on from that… Will My Lady Parts Ever Look The Same Again?
I don’t know about you, but I’m actually quite proud of my downstairs area. I mean, what is currently all neat and tidy will soon look like a damn traffic accident. Does it go back to normal? Will I be able to pee like normal? Is sex ever going to be the same? Can I even do that again?
Stop panicking. It takes time… but you’ll get there. Just try not to think about it!
What If I Poop Whilst Pushing?
Seriously, this is something I’ve actually had nightmares about! What if you’re pushing and pushing your precious little bean out and all of a sudden, a little pre-birth present arrives for everyone to see?
In reality – when you’re in that much pain and concentrating so much on your contractions and pushing, I’m pretty sure you won’t give a damn. My midwife friend told me that they whip it away that quickly, that no one tends to really notice anyway. And if someone does notice, are they really going to tease a hormonal woman who’s in the middle of pushing a person out their vaj? I don’t think so!
Ok, So How The Heck Am I Going To Afford This?
With standard maternity pay covering 6 weeks 90% wages, followed by less and less every week, I’m barely going to scrape my phone bill, let alone anything else. When you first fall pregnant, you literally sit and dream of an amazing year off, just tending to your little one’s every need.
Then reality hits and you’re like woah hang on, can the baby survive without me after 6 weeks, because I’m pretty sure mumma can’t afford to breathe anymore.
Obviously all these thoughts are natural, your body is going through a huge change and an increase in hormones are playing a huge part in how you feel. It’s completely normal to feel overwhelmed or nervous, it’s a scary process, especially if it’s your first baby.
All I can say, is that IT’S GOING TO BE OK!
See you in the next post,
Love Charlie x